Thought Process

I am sitting in a chair where my eyes were busy looking at a “Connect-IT” a software application which is showing me a error “ Error while processing event with Id '4cc86cce04bb6802': 'Cannot execute application: axces.database\r\nUnrecoverable error in application ”, and my short Brain is busy analyzing and trying to get the root cause as it needs to be fixed. SUDDENLY I dropped myself back into the chair closed my eyes ……….I am visualizing a million of instructions running in my so called HEAD as shown in movies :-). Suddenly not sure what happened started thinking of many other things… which I am documenting below.

• Why the hell am I acting here?

• What are my Interests?

• What am I doing?

• Why am I doing?

Are the questions I had for myself. To be BOLD my Interests are different and definitely not SOFTWARE.I am doing all these because I only know these and nothing else. Obviously I am doing all these things from Morning 9:00 AM – 6:00 PM for somebodyelse, for DOLLARS instead or RUPEES. Next set of questions in my mind.

• Why do I Need DOLLORS?

• Am I happy with DOLLORS?

 

For Friends, Relatives and Parents Dollors makes the difference and surely not for me. I cannot drive a car which is a passion of mine, I cannot eat PANI PURI when I like too, I cannot take a FAMILY out for dinner, I cannot feel the reactions of friends when they need me or when I am in NEED, BUT I can Gift a car to my DAD, I can order Pani puri online to somebody who like it back in there, and can buy gifts online and can never see the first expressions of my friends when they receive them. What all I can do is go to Office with a ironed SHIRT and a neat Trouser with a costly tie and polished shoes and act professional, will get some time on Weekends but most of the time I use it for updating my skill set or exploring on the existing issues or a watch a damm movie online. And doing all for DOLLORS which I would get MONTHLY ONCE and try to save it for OTHERS during the rest of the MONTH.

 

DAD did you do a mistake EDUCATING me and killing my freedom? and u should have encouraged me in other things. This is not a question to my dad alone but to all the parents…”are you educating your children only for Earning” I am not saying that my parents were doing it, I am telling that I don’t have any other options apart from doing it.

 

Suddenly another sharp turn in the Process. I started thinking about friends and society. A bitter one to digest… I have seen some quotes like “friendship is the rain bow between 2 hearts..” something like this..and I laugh heavily at them. I classified people into 2 different sections, 1) The section of people who interests me 2)The section of people who doesn’t interest me. I completely ignore the 2 group coz I am not interested. I give at most Importance to the group one irrespective of their thoughts on me. I laughed at me when my friends say “he is a best friend , he did not do this though I give him a lot of importance … he ditched me …” chill pill guyz the so called friend is your selection and your interest. To me “ No one will help you at the cost of his interests or his life, there is no point for him to help you, Everything is done with an expectation, its upto you how you receive it” . I will never forget the help I received from someone with whatever intention it is done. To me what matters is I am benefited from them at some point of my life cycle and I will make sure that I will add some value to their lives at some point.

when you say "you are one of my good friends"  or" ur my good friend". Think  what are you trying to do here..............

Yeah DAMMMM still I am yet to complete my Work and stuff Guyz ......:-(

Rest of the things after the break..

-Ram

Life....

My answer to the question “Howz life?” is just “Fine”.. Now I changed the answer to “AWESOME”. “Life” is always very small word in my own world, as I always kept myself pretty busy all the time with Family, Cousins, Friends, Issues, confusions, Solutions, Job, Competition and many other things. Since the time I know about me, I am occupied with something or the other which never allowed me to think about what I need and what my interests are..unknowingly Job and money are always my foreground jobs and all my other interests, hobbies are almost dead in the background.

I realized all this only when I got time to be on a vacation recently. It drove me to another world and I named it “HAPPINESS” where I don’t have any time to think about anything else except the showers of rain, noise of the river running side by, and eyes filled with greenery. while returning back after a 5 day vacation..I could hear my heart saying “RAM UR ELIGIBLE TO DIE NOW” .

That trip thought me few lessons, I lost interest in Money, for me it’s a medium of exchange for your needs and luxuries. Money is Important only If you can buy happiness….and it has no meaning if you face difficulties and tensions earning it @ cost of your precious health. I am not saying I don’t need Money, but I am saying its my back ground job for my foreground jobs. I conveyed my parents that I will not be saving it @ cost of my interests and happiness. I pity all those who earn and could not have some time for their OWN.

 These days earning is a difficult job, spending it for our needs is again a big job ;-). But at the end if we are satisfied with on what we spend its just AWESOME, Unfortunately we don’t…(I am also included here ;-)).This month I am only left with some 500 Dollars for the next 24 days.

 Living for your needs alone do not distinguish you from the rest of the world. A cute smile, a huge blush, great happiness in their eyes who desperately need it for their needs ….. are few things I like to  remember all the time.

Where are we Heading?

I remember my childhood days where there is a too much of value for a 25 Paise to buy a candy, and I dont have that then. Later there used to be a  value for a 1 Rupee where I can buy a toffee and I dont have that then. Later a value for 5 rupees for a Cadburys and I dont have have the same. Later I dont have a Hundred ruppes to buy a cricket bat, later I dont have 500 rupees to buy a branded Shirt, Later 1000 rs to buy a shoes.............Later donot have 30k to buy a mobile. NOW I DONT HAVE 45 LAKHS to buy a HOUSE. 

I am giving my example, and you can even relate this to yourself. The journey started from 25 paise and  travelled some good number of days and still the destination is not reached. For your information friends the destination will not be reached and the journey will not be halted coz WE DONOT HAVE A "TARGET". Yes, We donot have a target, Though we have a target you cannot stop this journey coz...its the simple reason ...as the reason why Anil or Mukesh Ambani cant stop there Business once they reached some 30k crores and start spending what they earned.

For us things changed, value of 25 paise is gone long ago and value of 1000 gone years back. But when Government anounces a gas for white card holders we will be in a quee there, We will be getting a rice in a ration shop without going to ration shop though we dont have eligibility to buy  the same. A fee reuibersement program  announced for certain people.. our children or we will be using the same program. A free house scheme annouced for poor people, we will get a house there. coz we earned more and we have influence..A call to MRO or a MINISTER will do every thing.

Every benefit scheme announced by the government to the poor..is being perfectly utlized by US who are POOR....not Poor interms of finicials...But poor interms of knowledge though we are well educated, poor interms of understanding poor though we know their pain. Poor is getting only a 9 paise of every rupee spent by government and in that 9 paise if we claim our share what will the poor really get. The fact is still they are 25 %  people in INDIA who still value 25 paise. Who is eating once a day, and studies is beyond their thoughts.

We blame politicians are corrupted, yes they are and every one knows that. But the question is, if they are really corrupted why are they still sitting and enjoying in that position. The answer is we are electing them..next question is why are we electing them?...ans is we vote for a party that we think that wins or we vote for a party which have done some favour to us by giving few things(things which should actually belong to poor) or some selfish reason. Every corruption by a Politician will have a reson and lets NOT BE THE REASON BY CHOOSING HIM. We should send a message that its hard to manipulate the educated and we donot fall for a bottle of wine or a television set like poor who is not educated.

I was into tears when I saw a little boy starring at me. he has some 8 or 10 years of age...looking continously and with a innocent face which draw my attention towards him. I bought him a cadburys chocolate he refused it and asked for a candy. And when asked what he wanted...he said he wanted my dress....I am bit surprised...and when asked why?  he thinks he would get some food( not money) if he wears that dress and goes out at 9 PM and comes back at 6 PM....

I gave him 2k...I donot know what he did...hope some body like us..... didnot drag the same away from him.

Lets behave educated and LETS NOT BE POOR FOR EVERY THING.

The pic is what I can visulize that we do to poor ........

Lets think 

-Ram

I Luv her...and finally she left..:-)

Hi friends ..hope this should be an interesting topic atleast for my friends...and for people who know me...

This month April is not that good for me I guess...every thing is a bad news..and bad news is about my topic "She finally left".....

I know her since an year.....I had every hope she will be with me till her end...she is cute...she is SMALL :) .. she is hard..though I tell her or though I dont ...she knows about my friends..and more than friends she know my feelings..my approach..my decency ..my cruelty...

Most of my friends never knew or I never Said them I like her and I LUV HER...but most of you guys  have seen her....if you have a interaction with her..you cannot take your looks out of her..coz she impress you to that extent..she is beyond your expectation.

But recently she is changed..she made up her mind to move away from me....and finally she did ...and this time Permanently.she never understood What I would be with out her?....she left me with nothing..she took away all my friends and all my contacts..my past memories...my happiness

I respected her word..and started adjusting life with out her..."Every thing that LEAVE us, will be replaced by a better option"... I believe in this..though hard. I started searching for a new one for some time...but she never had a replacement..but finally I succeeded...I found a replacement..she is not as intelligent as the other..but she has her own unique qualities which seriously attracted me .. but at the same time she is more beautiful in terms of looks...:) she is a good ADJUSTMENT

hellluuuuu hold on guys..here I am talking about my Iphone and my recent mobile Xperia X10...I lost my iphone and brought the other.But finally I found my DARLING(Iphone :-)), she came back to me and she will be happy with me..coz I know I will never loose her again.. dont ask me what would I do with the other...This time my SIS is LUCKY :-)

--Ram

Every one will be good if you take Postive...

Today I am away from home and abroad and I am living the perfect life, dont get carried away with the word "PERFECT LIFE" I used here, I will portray you what I meant. The idea of this post is to talk about different people I encountered and intern what they thought me. in fact what i learnt by observing them.

From the past 2+ years I unknowingly started analyzing people whom I know and even whom I am not aware. Initially it gave me an impression that I am good in analyzing but now if I think and ask myself, if any time analyzed myself? the answer I have is NO. I have met few some people here in Singapore who made me think twice before I deceide.

As usual I started  forecasting about my technical skills and started the journey of proving that I am great. This time I had a chance to meet a senior by name Vamshi. one day during the conversation with him during tea time.. he was telling few things in generic..I asked him a question and he is talking to another colleague of mine..He stopped that conversation and very casually said that he would answer that question after his conversation with the other. From that moment I decided I would never stop or break any others conversations in the middle. we had a great chat a couple of times and few points that are worthy that one should look upon in their professional life's

1) Never judge people, If a colleague is not doing well its not his fault. Its the failure of the management who never gave him enough space for him to work (or) fault of the management who have hired that person without proper interview. But Still u can use that person to work on some thing if u train him and give him the comfort

2) IF you feel u have high levels of IQ, What is the point of you conveying others that you have that? others will know that if you really have

3) Stop talking much, Start listening and I promise u will find the difference,Be polite and never underestimate anyone, everybody is good at some thing which we cannot be.

4) Never keep yourself in the problem solver shoes. Some times  u might fail and that time people never remember your past positive actions for them


5) Be Active pump energy into others, Be lively and ur thoughts would be the same


6) Care for the ones who cares you. Life is not limited to a single friend or a person. You will not be able to satisfy every one whom u think off..


7) Never Ask a person, what they think about you. If you do ..You are letting your self down. You are the best one to analyze yourself. No ones knows your strengths and weakness better than you.


8) While taking a advice from others..Just check if its really an advice..You will find people who will mislead you for their own benefits


9) life is a one time experience, why do you let others play or influence ur thoughts.. ur friends.. ur enemies every one is the result of your various ways dealing ur life. 


Be Happy and make others happy. Some might think you are a fool, Some might find you odd ..at the end you know what you are..one day others will know. Live like its you for others and not like for others it's you.

-Ram

Good person ....

Hi guys Every thing I write here is something related to the present scenarios in todays world......Here I am not drawing any line to ditinguish betwen good person or a bad person...I was thinking about how one become a good preson or Bad person ...I could draw some conclusions..My own conclusions...and you might not agree :-).

IF I consider "GOOD PERSON" as a single word...Then good person is inversly propotional to the word "SELFISHNESS"..If a person has helped you or contributed(or some favour) some thing  to you or your friend(some body else related to you..let it be in general) we will have some kind of postive impression on the same and from the next instance you look at him with the same...though a small negative approach has been shown by that person we do compromise ourself because of the previous impression we had on them...if the same approach is shown by person on whom we have a neagtive impression we will not accept it and focus that as something stupid that one shouldnot behave or do in life time...

Now I dont wanna discuss much obout whom we call a bad person...let me keep my understanding or observations about the one whom we call "GOOD PERSON".  ONE REMAINS AS A GOOD PERSON NOT BECAUSE HE IS GOOD, BUT BECAUSE HE NEVER GOT AN OPPURTUNITY TO SHOW HIS SELFISHNESS.  (Avakasam raka/laeka okadu manchevadu ga migilipothadu)...Guys before nagating with me..just think

This happens with all of us..we like few people and we try getting close to them to enjoy their company..for getting close to them we start some kind of actions in favour of the other person to gain a trust or impression or some other thing...these actions which we do varries from person to person based on the importace we give to the respective persons..Though good are we not Selfish?...for being to be called good.

Bottom line is .... mostly today we act to be good most of the times...

L"U" V

This is a Intresting topic...Might not be for your guys..but for me...I am not trying to define this word or give a meaning of this word. I will keep my experiences and leave every thing to your assumptions..derive what ever you can. At the end I am damm sure you will relate ur self with me at some point when you start reading the below

When I was into my 10th standard..I used to like a girl in the same class of mine. I was in fact mad about her and I named this feeling LUV..but I came to know some where down the realation she is a sister of mine ...but my feeling towards her never changed but this time this piscesian is cleaver enough and never conveyed this to any one because he knew that he will get belted if he tells it to some one. Now If I ask myself if it is really LUV? my genuine ans would be "NO" and I name that feeling as "LUST".

Most of the time we often confuse between the words(rather than calling words I call them feelings)"LUV" and "LUST". Its a human tendency to react towards the opposite sex when you find them attractive or good enough..and now we should name that feeling in a very posh way so that it can be shared across or communicated across.....because if you go to somebody and say I have a LUST on her..its sounds a bit odd and even hard so people around you would loose their impression on you...Just to avoid all these nonsense MODERN WORLD started using the word LUV...At the starting of this paragraph I said we confuse between LUV and LUST but it isn't the case...we know what we meant and what our feeling is ... but we knowingly overrite the word LUST with LUV in todays world to defend ourselfes. Funniest part is children from their preprimary started using this..Now please dont ask me whatz that feeling, is it LUST or LUV? you go bang your head get the answer and let me know. But I call that as LUST (coz its a kind of  reaction responding to opposite sex, lust should not be a negative word) than LUV coz they dont know what LUV is.....even I dont know the meaning of LUV till date.. but to me it is a "matured thought"

luv to me is a genuine feel or confidence that you give him/her stating "u r more than me". Its a promise of giving and not expecting. Its a concept of understanding and not complaining. Its about effection not a pretending action, finally its life time mutual agreement ,not a days deal.

Before ending this post..let me post you a quote that I read some where..."LUV doesnt exist without LUST "..I dont know if you agree but I belive 

--Chandu

Influence......

"The capacity or power of persons or things to be a compelling force on or produce effects on the actions, behavior, opinions". This the meaning you would get if you google my title. Always all the time knowingly, unknowingly, or with Passion we get Influenced by others and on that we build our character and we will carry it till the end of our life.

The time we are born we dont know what character is, We grow observing  both postive and negative actions or emotions of others which will have impact on ourself. If we like those we embed those in ourself and we try Immitating those at times and move on.If we dont like those we still remember those actions and they would be our benchmarks which we never can be or want to be or should not be..

I am not exemption, I get influenced very soon and I take an xtra step and start Imitating the perons from whom I got influenced. its general human tendency. I still remember the film "Idiot" a telugu film which had a great influence..Rather I can call it as Impact on me. when I say impact I inadvertently I  started inherting the characteristics of  the hero "Ravi Teja" I could only sense that when my friends said that I talk the way he did and though I know that is not my real charecterstics I could not giv it up coz they that is registered were already embeded in me.The recent experience is ..I took a friend of mine to some restaurant...while speaking to that friend...she asked me if I could stop acting like "SURESH"  and by the way SURESH is my previous Project manager who is a good...and I like the way he handles every one especially with the series of questions he posssess and try to get the exact things from the reesources. I am attracted to the way he deals with individuals and his conversations.......comming to the topic. till then I never knew that he has some infkuence on me..and from that time when I think if I really copied him?...My answer is YES...they are few words and expressions that were copied and rooted in me..few such words are  the way he spells "Agreed"  "Yes or NO"....the way he raises his eyebrows and show his hands to tell us "U deceide "... Finally what I am trying to draw here is.......

Your LIFE... and the way you are LIVING now... is copied or influenced from/by others with some built in qualities of yours.  feel free to comment if you dont agree.

We blindly belive the things that majority of the people belive...here I can quote an example of GOD From our childhood we were told that there exist a supernatural person who is controling the world? I have a different opnion on this..which might sound a bit ODD to you guys but thats what I belive..I have few questions for you now....

Does GOD exists? If your answer is "Yes" ..What does he do?  if ur answer is "he will help us in difficulties and punish the Wicked" then  What is he doing when the small little girl Vaishnavi is was packed in a plastic box and was dumped in a boiler of 1000 degree centigrade? (For the people who dont know Vaishnavi, She is a daughter of a politician cum busineess man. She is kidnapped and was crueally killed . she is some 8 years old ) If you are genuine enough now answer this urself...Do you think she has done some thing seriously wrong for which the so called GOD took her away from this world in such a cruel way? then dont you think even he is cruel? do you think she at the age of 8 will be able to think what is really good and bad? ... Though she is bad.does she deserve that kinda punishment .. do you think the one who killed her is a Human? if not what do u call GOD....I dont mind if you get me wrong...My point here is to say we belive the concept of god which is agreeable..but if we say he is the one who is driving the world and is responible for the universe...I dont AGREE(But this is what most of the people belive).

Lord RAMA,BUDHA, JESUS  and many others .......these are few people who are set as an example for Man kind. they are the superstars of their respective era's...example..Lord Rama is a good man and might have did many good things for which people at that time are very happy..after rama passed away his good nature is still remembered and is communicated to other genarations there after....and even today we set him as an example of a good man. This is perfectly fine...Call him GOD for the things he has done.. that is preety fine...but if you say Rama will save me if I jump into the fire, Rama will stop the evil things to happen with you if you pray him..If he is a God in literal sense why should one pray him? what about others who dont pray him? is he fine if the others who dont pray him are suffering? if yes is he not selfish? Can GOD be selfish?....just think.. is this agreeable. To me they are good humans, real time heroes who influenced many people..Thats it.I dont agree if you say the have some magical powers...who can get bread to some hundreds with a some mantra and stufff...then I call that as magic show and call him a good magician.

In real world Today GOD is a Religion, Religion is a vote bank for politicians, Religion is a revange for Laden, Religion is a revenue for governmets...greater the income from a particular temple/church/mosque etc.. that powerful is the god in that place..I pity the word "GOD" as it is even made commercial...I never understand all thesee..... because our parents and others around us say GOD is powerfull we agree and follow the same..

The above questions are the ones which I have no solid answers. If any one can please do post me and educate me in the form of comments...Till know I never prayed GOD coz I dont know what to pray. I Never understood the concept of prayer. Let me analyzee..what do we do in prayers..we chant some mantras or some words in which we praise GOD. Why should we always praise GOD? I dont know...does god like to be praised always? will he help only the ones who praise him?...NO IDEA for me..I go to temple because I belive.. one has built the temple because he is an extrodinary human being who is remebered for his good since ages..and temple atmosphere gives me a pleasent peace of mind scychlogically..People who were reading this might not have answers for few of my questions but still they belive in literal form of GOD because they are afraid that they would become an ODD MAN OUT in this society.

Ohh GOD this is becomming a big essay...Let me stop this here and continue with other things...

This is an attempt to understand few things which I never understood till now....I got influenced by many people and things. but I could not get answers for the ones I asked.....

-Ram